I can create and I can destroy.
This is a coupling dynamic of the person on the healing path, whose ability to create is strong and who can also self-destruct in one dysregulated state.
As we grow in our own capacity as medicine people, we can allow our awareness of this dynamic to help soften the edges of destruction and expand our ability to create.
As we hold our shadow aspects in deeper love and respect, our awareness of their presence can help us move back into creating our lives from a place of love.
It takes humility.
It takes strength
And a whole lot of messing up in destructive patterns to learn to say no to them.
To grow in resilience.
To take the traumatised one who wants to hide in addictive, out-of-body patterns and hold them in a greater truth, power, and love.
It takes a whole lot of tearing it all apart and rebuilding from scratch.
It takes down-regulating from fight or flight tendencies.
It takes melting freeze dynamics
And moving a lot of grief
To settle into our worthiness
It takes accountability
And trusting in angels and allies you may not be able to see.
Part of my work is to help people move through these states, back to regulation, where the medicine can be harvested and used to create, and no longer destroy.
This includes seeing what allies can be called upon to offer layers of support as you stabilise and uncouple.
The wasp spirit has been with me this past year, reminding me of my own create/destroy dynamics. Always flying into my life in perfect timing, displaying her black and yellow stripes, which hold the opposing medicine wheel directions of east (yellow/creativity) and west (black/shadow/destruction). She serves as a reminder for me to come back into my range so that my capacity for creativity can grow.
Perhaps this can serve as a layer of support if you find yourself navigating this dynamic yourself.